Saturday, 20 May 2017

EVERYBODY LOVES CHRIS!

Last week I put on a poll on the blog asking you guys what post you wanted to see next. The options were a brand new glutes collection, or a post dedicated to Canadian super freak Chris Bumstead. Over 100 votes were cast and the winning choice with just 7(!) more votes was...yep, you guessed it...a post on Mr Bumstead (sorry glute fans)!

So I think it's fair to say that all of us self confessed muscle addicts like different aspects of muscle. We all love outrageously developed muscle, but we all come at it from slightly different angles.

Some addicts favour the huge mass monsters and the excessive sized bulls of the muscle world. The roid gutted freaks who tip the scales at over 300 lbs. Who stomp and strut with their enormous sized asses spilling out of their posers, dwarfing every other person they come into contact with. Who live and breathe for being as huge as they possibly can, just so they can stand on stage in a pair of tiny posers, squeezing, flexing and showing off their freak show mass for an audience of adoring and freaked out spectators.

Others go nuts for bodybuilders who possess barely human, shredded-to-death conditioning. Shockingly sliced muscle lads who've pushed their physiques to unspeakable limits. Freaks with zero percent body fat and dick thin skin stretching over their ripped to ribbons slabs of phenomenally cut muscle. Lads with all year round Christmas trees sitting on their backs and quads that look like they'd be more at home in the costume department of Alien: Covenant than being attached to an actual human being.

Some of us love the competition look (super shredded and drenched in competition tan) while others prefer an off season, non-tanned look. Certain muscle lovers even HATE competition tan which is something I've always had a hard time trying to get my head around but there we go. Some of us like nasty, veiny, grainy daddies. Others prefer young, cutie patootie muscle lads (most of us like both!). Some like Middle Eastern muscle freaks who just PLASTER themselves in tan. Some prefer European muscle studs who are ALWAYS crazily conditioned and often handsome as hell. Some of us have a weakness for those All American muscle monsters who combine good looks and excessive size. And not half of us go bonkers enough for gorgeous, grizzly, butch as fuck British muscle bulls but hey ho.

And finally...some (surely, most?) of us go just a little bit gaga at the sight of a bodybuilder in pair of fuck-off shiny, usually colourful, thinly strapped, minuscule posing trunks! Some of us even like them so much that we own a few pairs ourselves (I can think of 5 lads off the top of my head and I'm sure there's a ton more)!

But no matter what angle we come from, there are certain bodybuilders who, for whatever reason, seem to be almost unanimously liked, if not loved, by the vast majority of us muscle lovers! James Flex Lewis (who doesn't love a bit of Flex?), Peter Molnar (how could you NOT?!) and Dallas McCarver (don't like Dallas? And you call yourself a muscle lover? PAH!) to name a few. And now, since from about, erm...last Summer, there's another certain bodybuilder who can be very much added to that list; 22 year old Canadian muscle freak Chris Bumstead!

So what's so special about Chris? First and foremost...THAT incredible physique. Mr Bumstead NEVER fails to step on stage in the most breathtaking condition. From his traps to his calves, almost every single inch of Chris' physique looks like it's been carved to absolute muscle perfection. And no talk of Mr Bumstead's bod would be complete with the mention of two things; those gloriously developed and beautifully thick glutes, and his brilliantly and uniquely detailed quads, which erupt in so much freakish detail when tensed that they practically look mutated.

Elsewhere he has rather good taste in posing trunks (often shiny and always brilliantly coloured), though I *would* love to see him in a pair of Muscle Potential trunks (I speak to those guys and they would very much love it too)! What else? He's one hell of a fucking poser who LOVES to freak out his fans and audiences by sucking in his (awesome!) abs in a freaky-as-fuck vacuum pose, and even occasionally cranks up the 'tude on stage when he's blasting out his bonkers crab most musculars (usually when he's guest posing with fellow Canadian beef head Dana Baker)! Oh, and if you hadn't noticed, he's also a bit of a handsome bugger too!

So go nuts, make some noise, or just sit back and marvel at, hands down, one of THE best and freakishly conditioned muscle lads to emerge from Canada, fuck it...bloody ANYWHERE in recent memory...



































I LOVE this short video of Chris and Dana guest posing in matching golden posers. Chris' quads look typically nuts and I love the bit where Dana cheekily points out Chris' thick, shredded glutes.


And check out this short video of Chris tensing his freakish quads. When they're relaxed they look relatively normal (for bodybuilding standards) and then BAM...he tenses them and they just explode with inhuman muscle and insane detail, and it suddenly looks as if you're looking at something from another fucking planet!

A post shared by Chris Bumstead (@cbum_) on

And one last video of Chris and Dana at another guest posing spot! Gotta love that joint crab most muscular at 0:51!

Saturday, 13 May 2017

MUSCLE WARS: BATTLE OF THE BUMS!

Since I can't decide what to post next on the blog I've decided to let YOU guys chose for me! Below is a poll with two different blog posts to chose from. The winning choice will make up my next post!

DING DING DING!! So in the blue corner we have a brand new "GLUTES GLUTES GLUTES" post (my first in a while)! Shredded to fuckery glutes, alien-like asses, absurdly sized bottoms and everything in between. And in the red corner we have a post dedicated to a man who is (without ANY fucking doubt) one of the hottest and most popular bodybuilders on the planet...Chris Bumstead.


So what's its gonna be lads? Glorious glutes V gorgeous Chris? Lots of big bums V one big Bumstead? A whole feast of bodybuilder bootie V a truck load of Canadian studliness? Get your votes in now…

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