Monday, 8 December 2014

AMERICAN MUSCLE FREAK DAVID PATERIK

A couple of weeks back I did a post on ridiculously hot Latin-American bodybuilder Santi Aragon, who won his weight class, and earned his IFBB pro card at this year's NPC Nationals, but while Santi was blowing away the competition with his crazy fucking conditioning (we're talking lines in the bum, full on bleedin' Christmas tree and rips and cuts you never even knew existed...FAAAWWKK) in the Welterweight class (why am I loving these shorter/lighter guys so much as I'm getting older?!), over in the Middleweight class, another lad (and mate of Santi's!) also had the other competitors weeping into their tiny posing trunks (may as well just go home now lads!) and the judges picking their jaws up off their laps with both awesome fucking size *and* an anatomy chart-like/rub your eyes all you bloody well went he really IS this inhumanely fucking shredded (again...FAWWWKK) conditioning! And the name of this once ordinary sized but now freakishly ripped, granite hard all over, ZERO percent fucking body fat owning, thinly skin (sit tight for a video of Dave trying to pinch said skin!) encased excuse of a human being (sorry Dave, I'm gonna need to see actual proof of that cause I'm not entirely sure I believe it!), who was widely critiqued as one of the most impressively conditioned lads in the entire show (along with Santi) and is now also an IFBB pro bodybuilder? DAVID PAT-HOW HAS THIS LAD NOT HAD HOW OWN BLOG POST YET-ER-OH WELL IT DOESN'T MATTER NOW CAUSE HERE IT BLOODY IS-IK!!

I've featured the odd picture of David on the blog before but I hold my hands up and say until very recently I never paid him a massive amount of attention. And now?? I BLOODY LOVE HIM!! To the point where I think he (and that naughty bugger Santi) might be the ACTUAL fucking death of me! Let's get the most obvious reason out of the way first which I've already touched upon in the above. David's physique is fucking INCREDIBLE! Apparently the chief executives at Webster's are currently facing their biggest dilemma yet. They're currently compiling a new picture dictionary and are torn over what to include under the word "SHREDDED". The options are a) a picture of David's insanely detailed, ripped to bits, impressively thick quads, or b) a picture of his granite hard, peeled to perfection, barely human midsection. It's a toughie! It's not just his jaw dropping levels of conditioning that shock and impress either. David's also packing some serious fucking mass! Those thick boulder shoulders and bulging, hard-as-a-rock biceps are particularly impressive in the size stakes. Throw in some hard, striated pecs which look particularly awesome (and slabby) during those side triceps poses, a pair of beautifully wide lats which look good from both the front and back, a freakish and seasonal looking lower back and some fantastically ripped glutes (I'd like to see those fuckers just a little bit bigger and a tad more striated but I'm really just being a greedy bugger now) and you have one phenomenal physique which really doesn't fall short in any area (let's just pretend calves don't exist OK? Who really cares about them anyway?!).

And once you've stopped physically gasping at how phenomenally conditioned Mr.Paterik's body is, allow me to draw your attention to one of the other (massive) factors as to why David is long overdue this post dedication. You may notice that in about 90% of the below pictures in which David is flexing, he looks rather happy about it/pleased with himself/loving every bloody second of being an absolute fucking FREAK! In other words, he's an outrageously cheeky, playfully cocky, incredibly intense, power packed, TUDE filled fucking poser of the highest fucking order! Ring ring...ring ring..."hello yes, A1 taxis? I'd like to book a cab with an exceptional amount of space in the back for two abnormally sized bodybuilders"! Sayonara Guy Cisternino, and toodle pip James Flex Lewis, there's a new face scrunching king in town and he goes by the name of (yep, you got it!) David Paterik! FUCKING SCRUNCH ITTTTTT! And the fucker doesn't stop there either. He grimaces, he squints, he puffs out his cheeks, he outrageously opens his mouth as if shouting "yeah" or letting out a loud roar like an absolute bleedin' nutter, and twists/contorts his bloody gorgeous (yep, he's a handsome bugger TOO folks!) face up into all manner of bonkers/cheeky/proud as fucking punch to be an insanely shredded, muscle packed BEAST expressions!! FUCK YEAH MR.PATERIK!!

And if you thought I'd just be relying on pictures to showcase David and all of his awesome above mentioned attributes, you'd be wrong! Brace yourself for a meaty feast of videos at the end of the post, which collectively include David tensing his insanely shredded quads, David lifting his shirt to reveal his otherworldly freaky abs, David hitting poses in his living room, David flexing and cranking hard for the camera in a gym, David waddling down the aisle of a supermarket unashamedly wearing nothing but a pair of posers and cheekily flexing as shoppers walk past (I kid you fucking not!), David in the same supermarket with his pants down showing off his freakishly muscular legs and bronzed ripped glutes to a poor check out girl and a queue of unsuspecting shoppers (can you bloody imagine??), amongst a few other slightly bonkers and insanely awesome things!




























































































































And now for Mr. Paterik in action! First up a short Instagram video of some insanely awesome quad flexing and ab flashing!


Anyone wanna see David pinching the freakishly thin skin covering his granite hard carved to perfection midsection?! Not a fan of body fat then David? Nope?! Didn't think so!


Ever see THIS going down in your local Tescos??


Two ripped bodybuilders with their pants down and posing trunks on display showing off their freakishly muscular legs to the check out girl? Yep, I see that pretty much every time I do my weekly shop!!!


"LET THE GAINS BEGIN!" *Cranks a most muscular "ARGGHH!" *Blasts another most muscular* "OOOOHMMM!" *Opens mouth like a cocky fucker while still in the most muscular pose* "ARGH!" *Struts out of view with the camera with a cheeky and smug smirk on his face*!


Time to practise some poses in the living room...



And some posing at Golds Gym, complete with his outrageously cheeky trademark facial expressions to finish!



I BLOODY LOVE THIS GUY!!

10 comments:

  1. I love him too! What freaking hot mass of shredded spunk. What do these boys do to their nips to make them so pointy I'd love to know...perhaps some man handling is involved? We need to see more of this god

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  2. Move over guys, I'm in line when it comes to lovin Dave. OMFG how can one gorgeous muscled stallion of a man be that perfect, or just as perfect when you see him posing with another gorgeous muscled stallion, Santi. If there's a muscle worship heaven, it's laying between the two of them while they're grinding out those poses and raining muscle sweat on you and the music you here is they're beautiful grunts and groans. WOOF!!!!!! What a post Addict. OMG!!!! Thanks.

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  3. He's so hot and his cockiness adds to the sex appeal.

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  4. Well fuck yeah- your affections are not misplaced when it comes to this muscle shredded hunk of beef burnin love and lust. Addict I am on board -love him and his cockiness reminds me of that uber hottie Brad Rowe- especially when Dave drops his sweats or tucks them in his ass crack to flash those hard beautiful glutes--he loves flashing his ass errr glutes and in the market -BTW who is his hot friend.. I'll buy a ticket. So DOUBLE WOOF!!! -I think you posted 180 pics or close to it- no worries I SLURPED THEM ALL.THANK YOU. HE'S A KEEPER AND SO CUTE TO BOOT arrrgh!~So cocky and why not- he's packin everywhere. You get a hug for this post.

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  5. Addict-Thank you for my early Christmas present- David Paterik- How did you know- so thoughtful of you. He can drop his tiny posers under my Christmas tree anytime or Palm tree too. I keep them in my bedroom. His sculpted muscle is sooo tight and he's crankin out those poses at Gold's gym..back double biceps,back lat spread, most muscular..LOVE HIM.
    You are not an addict you are a kingpin pusher in the muscle appreciation cartel.

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  6. My GOD, what a STUD!!!!

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  7. Hey Addict, as usual THANK YOU for the posts. For future reference, would you kindly post videos from the athlete's ink361 website - these can be saved, but not the Instagram ones. ;) Mr. Paterik is an AWESOME superstud!

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  8. MA
    Agreed, he's very hot.
    I'd heard of him before but only saw a couple of distant pictures of him, and so didn't really pay much attention.
    But with this expose of yours which includes many close-ups, I can see he's very good.
    He's all you said, here's few other adjectives one could add, he's very rugged (especially with his stubble), vigorous, energised, passionate, handsome, raw ...

    His physique is great, flared monstrous thighs and overall thickness. Yes, he calves could do with a little more work, but they don't throw his physique out badly.

    I loved the clips of him posing, he puts real vigour into it, and his facial scrunches are so damned sexy. The video of him posing at home, is so charged with testosterone radiating off from him, and his intensity makes it so bleeding hot, I can't help but get horned by watching it.
    TMA

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  9. Great choice for a post, addict. Mr. Paterik is so freakin' hot! A few more reasons he deserves so much praise and attention:

    1. Dude is always jacked.
    2. Dude has good looking friends. Seriously, everyone he poses with is handsome as shit.
    3. Dude love to pose. He's just having a great time showing off that killer bod.
    4. Dude enjoys his gear and undies. I've seen very few repeats. He likes to mix up the colors and patters. ANd I love it!
    5. Dude is not spring chicken. His face and muscle quality has just the right amount of majority. He's not a daddy... yet. But oh lord, he's gonna be!

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  10. WOOOOOAAAAAHHHH!!!! Where the HELL has this guy suddenly appeared from??!! Some amazing shots there. I have to say the supermarket stuff has got me hyperventilating. No I most certainly do NOT see that going down in my local Tesco's! Much as there are usually a fair few beefcakes from the gym round the corner stocking up on muscle food, they don't seem overly bothered about dropping their pants and getting their trunks out for the boys/girls! If I was being made to pick the best set of wheels at the checkout it'd be like 'ok fellas don't wanna invade your space but do you mind if I get down there for a better look??'

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