Saturday, 8 October 2011

ALL HAIL KING CUTLER

When I was 15 I bought my very first muscle magazine! I was pretty fearless as a teenager, and yet approaching the old dear behind the counter of my local Spar clutching a copy of "Muscle & Fitness" with an obscenely huge ripped fully tanned FREAK called Milos Sarcev plastered all over the front cover in all his freaky glory made my little chicken legs shake more than Liza Minnelli when she hasn't had a drop of alcohol for 20 minutes & my spotty teenage face redder than a lobster with a sunburn.

I'll never forget the face of the woman behind the counter as I passed her the magazine. She looked absolutely horrified! I practically threw my money at her and ran out of the store. The memory of being at home and opening up that magazine for the first time is forever etched onto my memory. I couldn't believe what I was seeing. Pictures of these huge hard guys of pure solid ripped muscle. Sure I'd seen muscular guys on TV, and pictures of bodybuilders on the front of magazines in shops, but, in the privacy of my own bedroom, I was seeing hardcore bodybuilders close up for the first time. It felt like I was looking at something that didn't quite belong to this world. I was very aware of the power that these images seemed to have over me, and the knowledge that this was a very rare effect, and that the majority of people would not experience these same feelings by looking at these images of hardcore mass muscle freaks. I knew I'd discovered something special. It was new, exciting, and incredibly horny!

I was turned on by pretty much every picture in that magazine. It was just page after page of big ripped muscle bulging monsters and every single one of them made my Calvin Klein's suddenly feel about 3 times too small for me. However, I did have a couple of favourite guys! Javier Datiz was one of them. A very good looking guy from Peurto Rico. He wasn't the biggest guy in the magazine, and now I look at pictures of him I almost laugh that he turned me on so much. If I'd have had access to the pictures and videos of bodybuilders you can find on the net today, I wouldn't have given Javier a second look. But back then, this magazine was my only avenue to muscle. There was one guy I liked more than Javier though. He was seriously HUGE and looked like he was made of marble. He was very good looking and had an All American jock look to him. His name? Jay Cutler!

Five years after discovering Cutler in my first muscle magazine, I saw him compete in the flesh at a bodybuilding show in London. He had been my favourite bodybuilder for all that time, and it was incredibly surreal seeing this monster in the flesh. He was a huge hit with the audience, the place seemed to go absolutely crazy when he came onstage. The image of him with his arms thrown at the back of his head, and squeezing his abs hard into an abs & thighs pose, with a big "eat shit" cocky grin plastered on his face, is another which is forever etched on my memory.

At that point my access to muscle was still fairly restricted to the magazines I'd bought as a teenager, a couple of Mr Olympia videos I'd managed to obtain, and any time I managed to sneakily look at pictures of bodybuilders on my dad's PC! Luckily that completely changed in the years that followed. I accrued a ridiculous amount of muscle DVDs (largely thanks to some very generous fellow muscle fans) and eventually had my own PC where I could easily explore the growing number of bodybuilders on the net. And then of course, along came YouTube! Spoilt with a large amount of huge, cute, handsome, ripped, cocky muscle boys at my fingertips, my love for Cutler took a bit of a back seat.

My love for him has been restored over the past few years. Now, of course, a 4 times Mr Olympia champion, he's bigger and crazier looking than ever and he's now sporting that insanely hot Johnny Bravo haircut (only took him about 20 years to finally get rid of the 90's curtains look). He might not be my all and out clear cut favourite bodybuilder any more, but he's definitely one of my all time greats, and every now and then I'll come across a picture or a video (usually around the time of the Olympia strangely) which reminds me of just how incredible this living breathing, flexing squeezing Muscle GOD specimen is.

There's a shit load of Cutler pics on the net. Below are the ones which I think are most likely to have any self respecting muscle nut running to the local launderette clutching a bag of creamy Calvins....


































5 comments:

  1. Great story. I really took the time to read it. I like Jay's physique. I think it's absolutely amazing. However, he's not the kind of guy I'd invite to my bed. Nevertheless, nice pics.

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  2. He's got a scrunchy face in almost all the pics! LOL!

    I'm glad Cochynolo has passed Jay over; there's more than enough room in my bed.....

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  3. Oh the memories of buying that first muscle mag and the effect it had!

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  4. that's some really stupid hair.

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  5. Jay is as unique as Phil Heath, and with Robert Burneika, my ideal of "The Three Kings".

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